What does your pain allow you to avoid?

What does your pain allow you to avoid?

“Everything that occurs is not only usable and workable but is actually the path itself. We can use everything that occurs–whether it’s our conflicting emotions and thoughts or our seemingly outer situation–to show us where we are asleep and how we can wake up completely, utterly, without reservations.” —Pema Chodron

What Does Pain or Suffering Allow you to Avoid?

Have you ever asked yourself this question?  Is self-healing from pain and suffering available if you can answer this question? Whew, we’re going there today. 

Let me first preface this piece by saying that pain and suffering are no joke. There are HARD places in life that can seem to go on and on without end or relief. And those challenges wear us down, cause real symptoms in our minds and bodies, and can seem to defeat us utterly. 

This post is NOT intended as a Pollyanna bypass on your pain, hardship, or anguish. Those places just suck, frankly. There’s no other way to say it. If that’s where you are today, I empathize and sympathize with you. I’ve been there too. 

And yet, we still have choices every day we wake up. 

Our theme this month is all about self-healing. And in that vein, there can be a sneaky block to the power of the mind to heal our emotions, bodies, and spirits. 

Sometimes, we may create pain and suffering subconsciously to avoid confronting ourselves, others around us, our circumstances, or massive and uncomfortable change. Today, I offer an opportunity to look at that possibility for a moment. 

Two quick notes before we continue:

  1. The caveat to this idea is that the subconscious part of our mind that creates pain and suffering does so based on it’s job to keep you alive and move you away from what you have labeled as painful or undesirable.  This part of your mind is NOT logical, it is emotional.  Please do your best to keep this in mind as you consider the following questions.
  2. Also, I am choosing to use the word “the” before the issue instead of “your” so that you can begin to look how you associate with the issue.  When you say “my pain,” you are taking ownership of it, rather than “the pain.” (I am choosing to capitalize the word simply to bring your attention to it.)

The Inquiry Process for Self-Healing

Think carefully with me.

  • What does THE grief, body pain, loss, or struggle allow you to avoid in your life?  
  • Does THE particular struggle allow you to avoid movement or exercise? Does it allow you to avoid confronting an unhealthy habit or substance? 
  • Does THE pain you feel make it easier to hold people you love at arms’ length? Or ignore an apology you must make?
  • Perhaps THE struggle helps you tether yourself to someone upon whom you rely, and if you were well, you may question whether that relationship might change (for worse or better?)
  • Does THE issue protect you from something you consider undesirable or painful?  Or allow you to deflect something you do not want?
  • Does THE suffering enable you to believe that you’re trapped? Is that really the truth? 
  • Simply asking yourself this powerful question can help you (safely and gradually) take an honest look at THE pain and where you may be stopping the flow of natural healing your brain and body are designed to undertake. (And it can help you clarify where you DO need help and support!)

Understanding to Give You the Power

It’s essential to remember that this line of inquiry is NOT intended to blame cancer survivors for their illnesses or to claim that if you were worthy as a human, you’d fix all your own problems and symptoms–not in the least.

Making a gentle inquiry like this one can help you EXPAND your self-healing powers as you examine your limiting beliefs–one at a time. Plus, you can amplify your “change” tolerance as you practice self-inquiry. 

When the life-upheaval the pain has allowed you to avoid loses its fear-triggering qualities, you clear a path toward greater self-healing.  This is how understanding gives you the power to make a change!

I’ve found that hypnotherapy is a wonderful way to embark upon simple self-inquiry (which leads to self-healing) with surprising results.   This is because hypnotherapy can bypass the logic and get to the emotion of a situation.

If you have never experienced this healing modality before, it’s not scary. 

I help my clients relax into a light trance space where we begin examining the beliefs that make you “tick.” When we find problematic, harmful, or limiting beliefs, we gently shift them in the trance state, so they stop halting your self-healing capability in your wakeful state.  Again, understanding is the way to freedom.

With time and practice, you can invite more self-healing into your life with fewer blocks to your overall comfort.

A Healing Hypnotherapy Workshop to Dig Deeper

I hope you’ll consider joining my next healing hypnotherapy workshop, which happens on September 9th. Our focus will be on the healing power of your mind and clearing the path to bring more comfort and ease into your life each day, week, and year. 

Discover what’s possible for you HERE, and I look forward to helping you claim the remarkable power of your mind as a primary healing force in your life.

PS: Here’s the link to learn more about working with me 1:1 if you want to go deeper into your personal situation.


Sara and Les

The Mindful Movement

Additional Resources:

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A personalized hypnotherapy session can support you in making a change you desire.  It would be my honor to help you through the process of change that you are looking for.

Let us know how we can help.  Please feel to leave a comment with any other suggestions, comments, or questions for the community!

About the author, Sara

Sara is the founder of The Mindful Movement and the owner of Coreworks Fitness, a Pilates and Yoga studio in MD. Sara is also a Pilates and CoreAligh Master instructor with Balanced Body.

Sara is passionate about helping others grow and live mindful, fulfilled lives. She helps others move better, feel better, live with a deep awareness, gratitude and their whole heart. She strives to inspire others to live authentically and passionately in love and abundance.

1 Comment

  1. Wendy Bailey on 08/18/2021 at 1:58 PM

    Very enlightening, thank you for sharing this. I do feel this, the pain is worse when I worry about things (I actually wrote ‘my’ pain too! Definitely changing my mindset)

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