Creating Transformations that Stick, Part 2: The Butterfly Effect

“The great solution to all human problems is individual inner transformation.”
–Vernon Howard

How can something that sounds so beautiful stop my progress?

Last week, I wrote about why making life changes is difficult for so many of us, individually. I discussed how our brains work hard to keep up the status quo, and that any type of habit change takes vigilance, guidance, and commitment to make it stick.

I also talked about taking change slowly, in little bites, and letting your body and brain adjust to the differences you notice as you shift your behaviors and (especially!) mindsets. Rewiring your inner critic is crucial to enjoying the benefits of changing your thoughts, attitudes, and actions.

BUT, what about the forces outside you? How do THEY respond when YOU begin changing yourself? Today, we’ll detail the Butterfly Effect and how it can threaten the transformation you want to happen in your life.

When a butterfly flaps its wings…

The Butterfly Effect is “a property of chaotic systems (such as the atmosphere) by which small changes in initial conditions can lead to large-scale and unpredictable variation in the future state of the system.” (Merriam Webster.)

In other words, when a butterfly flaps its wings in California, it can spark a snowball of disruption that results in a tornado touching down in New York a few weeks later, theoretically.

And so it is when we strive to transform ourselves and our lives. Everything around us (our relationships, our physical environments, what USED to give us pleasure) can move through waves of instability for a time. And that’s OKAY. In fact, it’s a necessary part of making strong our personal evolution.

Think about it. When you change the way you eat at home (and you live with other people), you automatically become a mirror for the rest of your household. 

Your partner may feel a sense of guilt, shame, disgust, or indignation about their food choices when you decide to eat more nutritious foods, try going sugar-free, or move away from fried foods–and then they (subtly or directly) implore you to go back to the way you ate before.

Or, let’s say you get promoted at the office, and now you supervise a bunch of your former coworkers.  All of a sudden, they stop treating you with the same warmth and inclusion–you’re on a different level now, and everyone knows it.

You feel awkward and unsure of how to move through this phase.  You miss hanging with your work buddies, and it’s SO tempting to quit the new role, just so you can go back to the comfort of your old crew.

The support (or lack thereof) of your immediate environment is an essential factor in your budding transformation–and cannot be ignored as you keep doing the “new” things.

How to ride the wings of the butterfly (and finally transform!)

In recovery circles, it is often said that part of maintaining sobriety is also changing your people, places, and things. In simple terms, if you struggle with alcoholism, it’s probably best NOT to visit a bar for a good, long while as you navigate each day without drinking.

Which means you may need to develop new friendships and new ways of finding fun, laughter, and intimacy in your life. Those are big rocks to climb, but we all have the capacity to make those changes–one day at a time.

That’s why having support and guidance from an experienced teacher (or group) is SO helpful as you embark upon any sort of life or lifestyle change.

Even if all you want to do is to stop the gossip this year and learn to speak your mind confidently at work, a healing or supporting professional can compress the timeframe and shrink the discomfort of your transformation.

It’s CRUCIAL to get curious about HOW you first developed the destructive, limiting, default or unhealthy way that you've done for so long–so that you can unwind those ingrained messages and develop resilience and commitment when the outside forces demand that you stay the same and stop growing and changing. 

You may also consider "How you will feel when this change has been made?"  And use this feeling to help you stay on track.

Hypnotherapy can help you emerge from the cocoon (and flap those butterfly wings for all they’re worth!)

My clients uncover the deepest, most eye-opening elements of themselves when we’re in session. They discover precisely how, where, and when they picked up limiting beliefs along the way, and then we instill NEW and accurate inner messaging to facilitate healthy and productive outside behaviors and actions.

My job as a hypnotherapist is to gently help my clients uncover what’s holding them back from the life changes they want to make, and to “reboot” their mindsets and actions–so their behaviors align with the results they want to see in their lives.  It is as if a client comes to me when they are stuck (not broken) and they simply need a little nudge to get unstuck.

After all, real and lasting change begins WITHIN us–with our core beliefs, our internal messaging, and finally, with our sustainable action–even when our circumstances and our people may seem to stand in the way at first. 

I help people go into the cocoon of transformation and I stay with them through the sometimes scary void of (necessary and temporary) discomfort, so they can “build” the person they want to become–one tiny butterfly wing at a time.

I’m scheduling new client appointments to help give the needed nudge to get unstuck, and I hope you’ll learn more if you have the desire for making a change.

Until then, be well and trust your inner voice for change,

Sara and Les

The Mindful Movement

Additional Resources:

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A personalized hypnotherapy session can support you in making a change you desire.  It would be my honor to help you through the process of change that you are looking for.

Let us know how we can help.  Please feel to leave a comment with any other suggestions, comments, or questions for the community!